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The Jiggle Ranger Saves The World By Defeating Fergzilla At Raven Lounge!

With Godzilla putting up big numbers at the box office this past week, it was only a matter of time before the PBRPRPSCLCS’s very own Fergzilla started putting up some numbers of her own. On Wednesday night it looked like that was going to happen as she tore her way through the competition at the Raven Lounge. Fergzilla seemed unstopable as she eliminated Chicken Ranger, Vyper+, Rob Eff , and Stinky Pussy on her way to the championship match. Would Fergzilla go on to destroy Rock Paper Scissors as we knew it? Or would there be a hero that would come from the shadows to save the world from this powerful threat?

The world’s last hope rested in the hands of The Jiggle Ranger. After making it all the way to the final match just one night earlier. only to be defeated by Megan Egg ‘n’ Cheese. Jiggle Ranger stood as the last defense against the imminent destruction that was brought by Fergzilla. Perhaps not the hero everyone wanted, he defeated Nothing Beats Rock, Hellcat, Mad-E, and Kingpin to make his way tot he championship round, and become the hero that we all deserved. Though the questions still stood, could he have enough in the tank to take down his opponent?

We headed into the final match of the night and that’s when The Jiggle Ranger called upon his power and summoned his Megazord (seriously, it happened). Coming down from the sky in the form of a giant robotic hot dog, Jiggle Ranger took his place inside the massive mech and stepped up to the table, face to face with Fergzilla. In the championship game, The Jiggle Ranger showed that he had all the makings of a legendary hero, doing the impossible, and defeating Fergzilla by a score of 3 matches to 1. Though he never actually made any real contact with Fergzilla during her defeat, she exploded in what can only be described as a low budget fireworks show and spun backward into the air, never to be seen again. Will the Jiggle Ranger return to the finals again on Thursday night? The world can only hope.

On the street side of things it got pretty sexy (term used loosely) when Kingpin beat out Sir Faust and insisted on taking this, American Beauty inspired, photo to the right. Neither player would play for the total of their stacks, so Kingpin ended up on top by a total of $133 to $125. This gave Kingpin two extra points towards his season totals, and the rest of us an image that we will never be able to unsee. Once again, this proves that you never know whats going to happen at an RPS Tournament.

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